Friday, July 2, 2010

Day 165: Time Trifecta

I've come to the conclusion that my time-management struggles most days come down to a fight between three things:  exercise, sleep, or writing.  It is impossible for me to do all three in any given day.  I can sometimes manage to do two of those (though sleep almost always loses out to some degree).  So I am in a constant battle to decide which thing is going to get neglected.  All three are important to me; all three are good for me.  Two are necessary for my physical health; one is necessary for my mental state.  So how do I choose between them?

I am attempting to think of them in a bit of a rotation -- if I have exercised a couple of days in a row, then perhaps I'll choose writing in my blog (and/or my morning pages) the next morning.  If I haven't slept well in several days, I'll buy myself an extra 30 minutes of sleep by taking the subway instead of  walking an hour to work (though I love that so much, I will rarely choose not to do that).  It is an imperfect system that usually leaves me feeling frustrated.  I haven't found a way to feel truly ok with choosing to not exercise or not write (while I don't feel bad emotionally about not sleeping, I just feel tired and cranky which doesn't help me get the other things done). 

I really need to learn how to not feel inadequate for not getting everything done I want to get done.  I do hold myself to a rather impossible standard.  But it isn't just that -- it is also these things make me happy and I feel frustrated that I don't have time to do them.  I keep saying "if only I didn't have to work" - if only I could be earning my money from doing what I love to do.  Oh-so-fortunately, I am more than halfway there.  I make more than half of my money now from teaching voice lessons, which is something I love doing.  My goal is to have enough students by the end of the year to be able to leave my office job and only teach -- which would allow me so much more time to write, and sleep, and exercise.  While I hate to live for the future, I have to admit that I am eagerly awaiting the moment when that happens.  (To that end, if you know anyone who is looking for a voice teacher, feel free to send them my way!  Info on my studio is on my website.)

And now, I'm off for a lovely three day camping trip - triple the amount of weekend I normally get.  I plan to do some writing on my play, and will report how it goes on Monday.  Happy 4th of July!
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